Saturday, September 30, 2006
Okay! so it isnt all that bad actually; aunt went to hospital to treat her leg cos she couldnt control her movement. Think she will be coming back to our place to stay.
I NEED ALOT OF DISCIPLINE TO MUGGGGGGGGGGGG
8:00 PM
My aunt who stays in my room at home just got admitted to hospital. She wanted to because she felt she wanted more proper care. or rather she needs people to attend to her every minute. I wouldnt say it is easy taking care of her because she needs to go to the toilet every 5-10 minutes and she's quite heavy(even my brother or 2 ambulance attendants cant manage it). However, we are more than willing to help her. My dad even bought a king size bed to put in my room so that she can sleep comfortably and fitted a higher toilet bowl in the toilet so it would be more convenient for her. I cleared my room almost totally so that she can have space to put all her stuff. And of course, ruby who had doubled the work compared to all other maids, had to take care of her, do housework and cook. All these are no trouble at all, so long as it could ease her pain and let have have a comfortable stay in our place.
But amidst all these, im feeling quite bad that she prefers to stay in the hospital or the nursery to our place. I feel that although i had given her what i could physically, i had not given her probably what matters more and most .....company. When she left in an ambulance just now, i was just reflecting upon myself that i could have been a better niece by staying at home more often and being by her side and just accompanying her. Afterall, being cooped up in the room all day long can be really lonely.Well.... But no, i chose to stay in hall 6 out of her 7 days, just so i can have the company of my boyfriend,my friends, and just so i can get away from home to study(i cant really study at home but i do try anyway). And all the time when i was at home last weekend, my eyes were glued on the screen of the com though once in a while i did chit chat with her. Now that she has left for the hospital and probably the nursery, my heart aches and i felt that i was very selfish.
On the other hand, my aunt has been very understanding; she knows that i have been very busy with school work and my midterms are just around the corner; in fact next week so she told me to do my own stuff.
sigh. so now as i sit here, wallowing in bitterness, I wished i had stayed home more often to accompany her and tend to her needs.
i dont know why but this whole incident just dampen my mood so much.
1:52 PM
Friday, September 29, 2006
oh dear. This is like one of the most inefficient holidays ever!
I have been wasting so much time and i dont know where all all my time went to.
I have 3 midterms..and im nothing near done.
Did i mention econs majors are supposed to be the most studious lot in arts?!
When i mean ive done little revision or close to nothing, i mean it. I aint no closet mugger.
And it doesnt help that im here procrastinating and wasting my life away.
argh
till then,
12:29 AM
Wednesday, September 27, 2006
it was a happifying day!
11:16 AM
cutest thing alive:)
Pretty sunflowers along suntec.
Planted for the sake of IMF.
sadly they are just there for show. I saw the workers removing the plants(including trees)one day after IMF has ended.
what the hellll
9:16 AM
Tuesday, September 26, 2006
things look better today.
thanks to you, the other you and another you:)
plans for today: get some readings done, mark tuition work, leave for tuition and out with ty!
to celebrate our post 9th monthsary:))
justina's slumber party tomorrow! It is held at a gallery hotel along mohammad sultan rd. Sounds exciting! And it should be loads of fun with so much catching up to be done with the arts og peeps.
yay!
11:37 AM
Monday, September 25, 2006
dripping nose and bleeding heart.
And on nights like these, i jus wish ill sleep and never wake up. Sometimes, i just dont want to wake up to harsh reality, superficiality, disappointments and all things unpleasant.
I feel sick, inside out.
On a brighter note,
thanks to my dearest nehbud, key for the tortee bookmark. Many thanks for attempting to cheer me up:)
My brother bugged me for my new blog address, so anyways i guess you should be popping by. HELLO KOR.
Thanks for sending me back to hall;)
I miss trevor the furball already:(((
Now its back to hit the readings.
11:33 PM
Sunday, September 24, 2006
Despite feeling really unloved today,I came home to a loving little thing who greeted me with kisses and licks.
And it continued for ten minutes before i went for a bath.
Maybe God was sending his comfort through this little doggy.
Somehow i do feel better.
12:06 AM
Saturday, September 23, 2006
I just got back to hall. I went for handball training followed by lunch with the team at subway. Training wasn't all that tiring as it was mainly teaching and helping the freshies. Well, I am going to change from a left winger to a second left so Ive got to train really hard. I always feel there's a need for individuals to be really competative to do well in sports. The team's pretty good this year; with some zai yr3 and yr4s seniors still around. We have a strong team, like last year.
This week has been mentally tiring and im sighing as im typing this out. Thank God it's almost over. All i could summarise this week is that; expectations only breed disappointments. So i guess from now on, i should just expect the minimum.
I am really extremely disappointed with many things this week.
I wish i could just cry buckets and let all out.
On a lighter note, Yesterday, roy and i sorta confirmed our members in the com. The next step is to get down to more planning. I really hope all works out well for the coming 2 sems. Anyway, it was really relaxing to join the B4 guys and some others for supper bbq last night. It was funny to hear all the scandal shit and their dirty jokes. And it was nice of tianyou to keep cooking for me though i was really bloated after that. hahh. A4 girls should have a bbq sometime soon!
I shall end this and may next week be a better one:)
1:09 PM
Friday, September 22, 2006
HIIII
I havent been blogging for some time. And i have been really busy with tuition, school work, bizcom stuff amongst other things. Didnt know conducting interviews can be quite tiring.tsk.Anyway,the mid term break is finally here, and i really glad cos i sooo need it!! I have 3 mid term tests to prepare for of which im terribly lagging behind in my readings and revision for econs. Then i have to give intensive tuition for the coming 2 weeks since the kid's having his PSLE soon.
Today shall be a break from the my hectic busy schedule. Going shopping! With alison first before i meet becks at night. Retail therapy always works for me; especially since i havent been exactly happy lately. I have never been a quarrelsome person but it seems like im becoming one in this relationship. And i feel quite distant from some of my close girlfriends who are really close to my heart, namely zes, joanne, and hong. Distant in the sense i have not seen joanne and hong for a lonnggg time. Distant in another sense cos zes and i have not had a good talk and a bestfriend day for some time already. Everyone seems to be too caught up with their busy lives to spend some time with their gfs. At least, im guilty of it.
And its been some time since i last spent time with God. I think i will need some time alone tonight to pray and have quiet time with God. Hall life can take a toll on spiritual walk and it does require ALOT of discipline.
I hope mum's fine. She was pretty worried about kor last night and she called me and cried over the phone. All i could do was to give her words of comfort. I dont make a good confidant cos i always end up feeling quite useless at the end of a conversation. But i guess i can provide a listening ear, if that's even enough.
see, my mind's clouded with many worries. How can i be happy. :((
But dont worry, people who know me well would know im rather optimistic and cheerful.
And that's why i need...retail therapy!!
12:02 PM
